#RRBC, It’s Time to #Pay It Forward! @VashtiQV

Watch Nonnie Write!

Hello, all!  Today is PAY IT FORWARD Day at RAVE REVIEWS BOOK CLUB (RRBC) and I’m supporting one of our newest members, Vashti Q!  (I just love that name, by the way).  Since Vashti is a new member here, we haven’t really gotten to know one another well enough for me to speak on her on my own, so, why don’t I let Vashti tell you about Vashti. I mean, she is the Vashti expert, wouldn’t you agree?  I think you’ll find that Vashti is more than just a pretty face.

Vashti Q.png

IN HER OWN WORDS:

Hello! My name is Vashti Quiroz-Vega. I know, my name is a mouthful, but if you can learn Arnold Schwarzenegger, Saoirse Ronan, Charlize Theron, M. Night Shyamalan, Jean Claude Van Damme, and Nikolaj Coster-Waldau––mine will be a snap. ⇒JUST KIDDING!

I share quite a bit about myself on my blog (maybe too much?)…

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In An Attempt To Make Myself Relevant I Have Written An Essay

Great humorous essay

Tara Sparling writes

Overly Explanatory Introduction: I’ve been experimenting lately with the essay form, because hashtag millennial, zeitgeist, modernity, youth, the internet, etcetera ad infinitum lorem ipsum expelliarmus. 

All the young people are doing it, you see. I’ve long wondered about the trend for personal essays (except when it comes to David Sedaris, who makes all of the sense) so I thought I’d experiment by trying to write a short essay which was perhaps humorous, but not necessarily that personal. There are only so many tales I can stomach of crippling personal grief or embarrassment on the road to personal revelation (leading, most probably, to further crippling personal grief or embarrassment), so I have no wish to add to them.

Also, this summer I will be experimenting with not constantly giving out on this blog about things I possibly don’t really understand which might possibly create embarrassment in my future. And that’s about as personal as I’m going to get.

So…

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ANOTHER FATHER’S DAY—PLEASE–NO MORE TIES!

Origin of Father’s Day, past and present celebrations.

Dad’s Delight: Another Father’s Day,  not Another Tie

Fathers always seem to get second billing. Father’s Day follows Mother’s Day, and even Children’s Day, although no one takes Children’s Day seriously except the children. Mother’s Day usually means breakfast in bed (a dubious honor), flowers cards and gifts.

Fathers, on their designated day, get ties; hideous dated ties that store owners save up all year and then offer on sale to unsuspecting children. Wives are apt to acknowledge their husbands fulfillment of fatherhood by buying them tools to fix things around the house, then letting them foot the bill. 21th century fathers would much prefer a variety of I-gadgets.

If it weren’t for Mrs. John Bruce Dodd of Spokane, Washington fathers might still be a forgotten entity. Dodd suggested venerating fathers to Rev. Conrad Bluhm, president of the Spokane Ministerial Association as a suitable tribute to her own father, who, upon the death of his wife, successfully raised his children.

Her proposal was approved by the Association; the first celebration took place on June 19, 1910 in Spokane. Although the rose is recognized today as the official flower for Father’s Day it was originally a lowly dandelion because “the more it is trampled on, the more it grows.” This tongue-in-cheek suggestion reflected the inequality of parenting. Motherhood was revered next to godhood; fatherhood, in this respect, was compared to a common weed.

In 1911, the observance of Father’s Day in Chicago came as a novel idea. Jane Addams, the famous social worker, approved the concept, saying “Poor father has been left out in the cold . . . But regardless of his breadwinning proclivities it would be a good thing if he had a day that would mean recognition of him.” Pres. Calvin Coolidge, in 1924, expressed his approval of the idea as he wrote, “As I have indicated heretofore, the widespread observance of this occasion is calculated to establish more intimate relationships between fathers and their children, and also to impress upon fathers the full measure of their obligations.”

Fathers of the 21st century participate more in the daily care of their children. In some instances it is voluntary, in others it is necessitated by both parents working, causing the workload and pleasure of childrearing to be shared. Feminist pressure has helped to release the male from stereotyped thought and behavior, making nuclear families more a cooperative than a monarchy.

Before there was widespread observation of this holiday, different sectors of the country celebrated independently in different ways, even different years. The tradition eventually spread throughout most of the Americas and parts of Europe and Asia. A general agreement was settled upon on June 16, 1946, more than 30 years after Mrs. Dodds suggestion. Fathers finally got their day

Both Mother’s Day and Father’s Day have become “Hallmark Holidays’’ and while florists and confectioners flourish on the second Sunday in May, haberdasher’s profit on the third Sunday in June. Commercialism aside, it seems right and fitting that on at least one day of the year fathers receive recognition and tribute from the children who bear their names, their legacies and their love. And what father can’t use another tie?

“Father! To God himself we could not give a holier name”— William Wordsworth

Thursday- A Little Personal – Lucy Returns

This is adorable!!

Fiction Favorites

“Hi, Boss.”

“Oh, Hi Lucy. How are you doing?”

“Just fine boss. You know Baily, and I were thinking.”

“Pretty dangerous stuff there, kiddo.”

lucy

“Okay, I was just kidding. What is on your mind?”

“You know when you are on the computer?”

“Like now?”

“Exactly.”

“What about it?”

“We have no one to play with.”

“How about the backyard?”

Lucy

“I don’t know boss. What do you Think Bailey?”

Bailey

“Why do you get me involved in your messes? The back yard is nice.”

Lucy

“She would think it was nice. I was going for more.”

“I know you were, sweetheart. Why don’t you and Bailey go out for a while and I’ll join you later.”

Bailey and Lucy

“Okay. Don’t be long. Wait. Stella is in the way.”

“For heaven’s sake, you outweigh her by 50 pounds.”

“Yeah, but she carries those knives wherever she goes.”

“Be brave buckaroo.”

Stella

“A little bit on honing on these blades and…

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Childhood Trauma Cured By Love Therapy

BAFFLED BY LOVE

Stories of the Lasting Impact of Childhood Trauma Inflicted by Loved Ones

By LAURIE KAHN

“Love is why they come to therapy

     Love is what they want

         And love is what they say is not going well for them”

The basis of this outstanding non-fiction piece of work is love. It is the core of the book; the beginning, middle and end of the story. It’s also destructive by causing deep-seated pain and suffering to children and adults of all ages. As the author, “a pioneer in the field of trauma for 30 years writes . . . therapy, at its best, is a story about the repair of love—the restoration of the capacity to love and be loved.”         Her patients, men and women of all ages, come from various occupations and situations. Each has a different trauma, needing the healing medicine of love. And each relates their childhood trauma in myriad ways.

According to author/psychotherapist, Laurie Kahn, these ‘walking wounded’ come to her looking for answers to questions many cannot even grasp. In most cases the abuses are not the violent attacks of rape (with some exception), but rather the seductive, manipulative abuse by parents, family members, priests, babysitters, a coach, teacher or friendly neighbor—the very people who should love and protect them. And in their sick or demented way many do love their victims. As difficult as recovery from violent sexual abuse is, recovering from abuse inflicted by and with love can be as bad, or worse and take longer recovery. Laurie Kahn’s clients come to her to tell their individual stories.

What I find most remarkable is that Laurie slips in flashes of her own childhood traumas throughout the book as well . . . to the reader, never her clients. As a victim of childhood abusef, I find this both fascinating and incredible. As a therapist of great repute, Laurie leads her victims to self-discovery and wellness, even those who may need years of therapy. As a victim herself, who better can understand the destruction this type of abuse causes? Surely it lies as deeply in her sub-conscious mind as her clients, which as this book shows, can be an asset for both client and therapist.

One client, Kristy, (all client names are changed) comes to see her but is so skittish that she cannot be spoken to or speak herself. Instead, she makes two yellow paper flowers and lays them side by side. This is her ‘code,’ her way of trying to open up to Laurie.

Jessica, at eighteen, tries to report her abuse to her friend’s mother, but becomes mute and faints. Later, at the hospital, a therapist treating her falls in love with and has sex with her. He meant well, though breaking the code of ethics, and married her. Jessica comes to Laurie, realizes she was used again and discovers she now has choices she can make.

Another client, Dan, must be handled with utmost care, as Dan’s emotions are mixed up and intertwined, causing him to make a play for his therapist. Laurie uses her special skills to direct his feelings in a healthy way.

Baffled by Love is an extraordinary book, in that it’s made up of true stories about real people who are healing through love therapy. Everyone who has experienced childhood abuse and trauma will benefit from this book. I did not understand why I never felt loved, even though as an adult I have a large family that deeply love me. Now I understand. Those not having been abused need to read this book in order to be on high alert for abuse done to their loved ones. This type of abuse is particularly insidious and often the blame and guilt is placed on the victim.

Laurie Kahn’s credentials and talent as a debut author equal her abilities as a psychotherapist, as her following words state so perfectly:

“Behind every first book there are angels who blow on your wings until you can fly.”

This author has her wings and then some!

Micki Peluso; author of . . . And The Whippoorwill Sang

Childhood Abuse Healed by Love Therapy

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BAFFLED BY LOVE

Stories of the Lasting Impact of Childhood Trauma Inflicted by Loved Ones

By LAURIE KAHN

“Love is why they come to therapy

     Love is what they want

         And love is what they say is not going well for them”

The basis of this outstanding non-fiction is love. It is the core of the book; the beginning, middle and end of the story. It’s also destructive by causing deep-seated pain and suffering to children and adults of all ages. The author, ‘a pioneer in the field of trauma for 30 years’ writes . . .” therapy, at its best, is a story about the repair of love—the restoration of the capacity to love and be loved.” Laurie Kahn’s patients, men and women of all ages, come from various occupations and situations. Each has a different trauma, needing the healing medicine of love. And each relates their childhood trauma in myriad ways.

According to author/psychotherapist, Laurie Kahn, these ‘walking wounded’ come to her looking for answers to questions many cannot even grasp. In most cases the abuses are not the violent attacks of rape (with some exception), but rather the seductive, manipulative abuse by parents, family members, priests, babysitters, a coach, teacher or friendly neighbor—the very people who should love and protect them. And in their sick or demented way many do love their victims. As difficult as recovery from violent sexual abuse is, recovering from abuse inflicted by and with love can be as bad, or worse and take longer recovery. Laurie Kahn’s clients come to her to tell their individual stories.

What I find most remarkable is that Laurie slips in flashes of her own childhood traumas throughout the book as well . . . to the reader, never her clients. As a victim of childhood abuse, I find this both fascinating and incredible. As a therapist of great repute, Laurie leads her victims to self-discovery and wellness, even those who may need years of therapy. As a victim herself, who better can understand the destruction this type of abuse causes? Surely it lies as deeply in her subconscious mind as her clients, which as this book shows, can be an asset for both client and therapist.

One client, Kristy, (all client names are changed) comes to therapy, but is so skittish that she cannot speak herself. Instead, she makes two yellow paper flowers and lays them side by side. This is her ‘code,’ her way of trying to open up to Laurie.

Jessica, at eighteen, tries to report her abuse to her friend’s mother, but becomes mute and faints. Later, at the hospital, a therapist treating her falls in love with and has sex with her. He meant well, though breaking the code of ethics, and married her. Jessica comes to Laurie, realizes she was used again and discovers she now has choices she can make.

Another client, Dan, must be handled with utmost care, as Dan’s emotions are mixed up and intertwined, causing him to make a play for his therapist. Laurie uses her special skills to direct his feelings in a healthy way.

Baffled by Love is an extraordinary book, in that it’s made up of true stories about real people who are healing through love therapy. Everyone who has experienced childhood abuse and trauma will benefit from this book. I did not understand why I never felt loved, even though as an adult I have a large family that deeply love me. Now I understand. Those not having been abused need to read this book in order to be on high alert for abuse done to their loved ones. This type of abuse is particularly insidious and often the blame and guilt is placed on the victim.

Laurie Kahn’s credentials and talent as a debut author equal her abilities as a renowned trainer of psychotherapists, as her following words state so perfectly:

“Behind every first book there are angels who blow on your wings until you can fly.”

This author has her wings and then some!

Micki Peluso; author of . . . And The Whippoorwill Sang

Winning Story for Tales2Inspire

INSPIRING STORY OF THE WEEK – THE GIRL WHO LOVED CHRISTMAS by Micki Peluso

INSPIRING STORY OF THE WEEK
THE GIRL WHO LOVED CHRISTMAS
by Micki Peluso

This is the inspiring story of Noelle Marie, a little girl who loved Christmas with such passion, she was convinced this holiday belonged to her. During her short life, […]